Civility

June 22, 2020

Listen to Yourself

Living through, or even observing these moral, economic and health crises continue to unfold is taking an emotional toll. We have three choices in response to a crisis. We can fight, flight, or freeze. We can move in with high energy and take control; we can move away, going about our business in denial, or we can stop.  People have moved through heroism and adaptation at this point in the pandemic crisis and are finding themselves depleted. We recognize our lost certainty, command, and control. Apathy, anxiety, fear, anger, and grief are consuming and disrupting us. It’s time to become […]
May 25, 2020

Supporting Employee Emotions

David Rock, Ph.D. coined the acronym SCARF which stands for Status, Certainty, Autonomy, Relatedness and Fairness. These are the five domains that influence us emotionally, much of the time as a threat. Leaders can mitigate the impact of SCARF threats by creating some SCARF rewards. Status Common status threats include not being able to influence work decisions, feeling one’s opinions or concerns are minimized, being a target of sarcasm or ridicule, and feeling disrespected. Leaders can work to diminish this threat through soliciting employee concerns and perspectives, active listening, demonstrating vulnerability (I’m having a hard time with this, too) and […]
September 23, 2019

Kindness Pays

People should be treated with basic kindness. The way we treat each other establishes our relationships. People don’t need a reason to be kind. Yet kindness has a powerful impact.  Kindness generates connectivity and trust. Research has shown kindness increases productivity, prosocial behaviors and can even improve health.  The Association of Professional Executives of the Public Service of Canada (APEX) conducted a comprehensive study which revealed shocking comparisons between the most civil teams and the least civil teams. Respectful teams possess 26% more energy; 30% increase in feelings of vitality and are 30% more motivated and likely to acquire new […]
June 24, 2019

Death is Unfixable

There is a stigma associated with suffering. People don’t want to show it and onlookers don’t want to see it. Grieving the loss of a loved one is a private sadness.  Caring communities come together to support those in grief. Workplaces promise a sense of community yet have much to learn to better support an employee’s grief. A recent article in Harvard Business Review When a Colleague is Grieving shares research and insight of how workplaces and managers can support employees in grief. Many people are familiar with the five stages of grief described as a steady process from denial, […]